A friend wrote to me today describing some anxiety she was feeling in her new job in the tech industry.

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She said "The weirdest thing is that I feel majorly intimidated by a 21 year old that has just joined my team at the same time as me."

Going on to clarify her feelings, she messaged, "it makes me feel very old and non-techy. But I'm doing my best to hide my intimidation with banter!"

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Her confession drew two things out of me:

1) I was immediately drawn in by her vulnerability of having these negative feelings towards her new colleague and herself. I loved her more for her candidness.

2) I related to these feelings immensely! There are people in my life I feel intimidated by, whom I would prefer not to feel this way towards.

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It reminds me of a Zen saying: "More suffering necessary." When an inner change/upgrade is required but not accepted, we must be prepared to suffer further. What is that inner change? Harmony with another. Perhaps that is what my friend is seeking when she engages in banter, or perhaps it is still the avoidance of the suffering to come!